Be Kind to Yourself

Something I have struggled with for a very long time is expecting more of myself than from anyone else. When people would come to me expressing self-doubt or insecurities, I would always find a way to make them feel better. To remind them of their incredible accomplishments, their many talents, their beautiful bodies, and so on. But when it came to how I spoke to myself, I was unforgiving, ruthless, and in many ways abusive. Words like failure, stupid, unattractive, overweight, lazy (the list goes on) would flow through my mind making me feel like the bullied kid on the playground. Why is it that I was so supportive of others and so hard on myself? 
 
Too many times we place ridiculous expectations on ourselves that we would never expect of other people. We expect to be the best in our careers, the top student in our class, the best mom to our children, keep the cleanest home, cook the most delicious meal, and be the most attractive woman! In fact we look at models and expect to look exactly like them if not better. We read about CEOs and strive to climb even higher up the ladder. We expect to be better than the best, and in every way possible! Just me? I don't think so! Otherwise the cosmetics industry would not be as lucrative, nor the health and fitness industries. And those millions of  "success in 30 days" books would not have been printed.  
 
I really had to challenge myself to be kinder...to myself! Now think of me what you want, but I will tell you it works! I learned to speak to myself. Out loud! While it is still uncomfortable for me to do, I find time in the car to compliment myself. Sound crazy? Well so is bullying yourself and you've been doing that for years!
 
So what are some things I say? I tell myself I'm proud of me. That I am beautiful and I thank myself for taking care of my body. I tell myself my outfit looks good and that I hope I have good day. It doesn't have to be a full-blown conversation, but just a few simple words. Even.... I love you. Why does it seem so wrong to tell ourselves we love us? Well, let me ask you this. Wouldn't you want your children to love themselves? By loving ourselves, we are showing them they can do the same. 
 
Lastly...one thing I did years ago was I put out a framed photo of me as a child. It was my 7th birthday and I remember so much about not only that particular day, but also about who I was. My hopes and dreams. My imagination and my heart. And I look at that photo and remind myself to be kind to that girl who has now grown up. I continue to dream for her and strive to create the life she hoped to create. I'm kind to her.... and so I am kind to me. It might sound totally crazy.... so I dare you to try it! Be crazy! But remember to also be kind.