My Cocoon...

This particular entry might be all over the place and that is probably because my thoughts are exactly there. All over the place! I am realizing that while my focus has been on growing my wings (which is taking forever!) I had yet to even enter a cocoon. Now, I am not an expert on insects so please do not take what I write as entomology (I had to look that one up!). But I know enough to know that inside the cocoon is where the transformation from caterpillar to butterfly takes place. For years I had hoped that the life I always dreamed of would find me. Despite working in the same job, partaking in the same activities, watching the same television shows, complaining about the same lack of sleep, and crying over the same bank account, I truly believed that my life would one day be different. Like I would go to sleep with the stressful life I had created and would wake up to the life on my vision board. It sounds ridiculous, doesn't it? Then why do so many of us do it? 
 
Coming to the realization that if I want to see change, I need to be change was indescribably empowering. I have felt immensely optimistic and have learned to find inspiration in each day. While I thought to myself I must be a butterfly, I am now learning that my transformation has just begun. I have entered my cocoon and it will take times to develop my wings. But when I finally do, I will be free. And the sweat, tears, frustration, long hours, and fears of failure and inadequacy will be totally worth it. 
 
Before I end I will add something I learned today. The illusion that the accumulation of material things is representative of happiness and success. Much of my time was spent imagining the home I would own and the things I would fill it with. The vehicle that would sit in the garage and the size of my backyard. This is not to say that those who want those things are wrong, but they are not everything. I am learning that there is no true value in things when those things are paid for by working 80 hours per week, spending little time with family and friends, stressing over deadlines and projects, drowning in debt because the money made is just a little less than the dream car. I am choosing to live a more minimal life so that I can experience true happiness, which doesn't end after a one-week vacation. I want memories and experiences. And once I break free from the limited life I lead, I refuse to go back by setting my eyes on those material possessions. This, you could say, is among my first transformative lessons.